Linda Blair 2.0

Feeding L is disgusting.

There I said it.

It was so exciting with K, first kid and all. With C it was tolerable, but sorry Miss L. You are revolting.

As if baby food isn't gross enough on its own. The textures, the smells. Bleh. But now lets add that it goes in and out at least twice before you manage to either swallow it, OR, a personal favorite, buzz you lips and send it flying. I seriously might have to start showering post feeding. Its becoming a bit much.

Today was an all time gross out winner. Mashed avocado sent spraying over a 6 foot radius. It was far too reminiscent of the exorcist. Thank goodness you're much cuter than Linda.

Do they make sneeze guards for kids?

Women Drivers...

My sweet girl has been rolling and pushing herself all around the house. She's not crawling yet, but she's certainly getting around. I'll usually let her play when I'm cooking dinner or tidying up.

Yesterday she got herself hung up on the sofa:

Which doesn't seem the big deal, until you look at it from a larger perspective:

There is like NOTHING around her!

I'm having nightmares already...I think Daddy will be teaching her to drive.

Potty Humour

C is such a big boy. He finally decided to start using the potty about a month ago, and once he decided, its been pretty smooth sailing.

He runs into the kitchen, "Mommy I pooped, come see!"

And although I am extremely excited about the actual potty training success, I still don't quite share his enthusiasm in checking it out. But, I still go.

"Look Mom" He says, "There's a big one and some little ones..." He pauses and then says, "There's a Daddy one, a C one, AND a L one."

Conversations I really never thought I'd be having. :)

Disproving Darwin: Parking Lot Survival

What is is about getting a great parking space that makes us all feel so good? The intention is to go into a store and walk around, it can't be pure laziness that motivates us to get that spot. Is it really going to save that much energy to have to walk 4 car lengths instead of 6? 

But we all do it. We all want to win! To get up close, to get that perfect space. 

Driving an SUV in Calgary, I've definately had my parking lot battles. The spaces are just too small for the giant vehicles we all drive, and I've thought about cramming into a too-small spot, but reconsidered knowing full well that it just wouldn't work.

But on Friday I witnessed something truly mindboggling. Something so bizarre that it has made me seriously question the whole concept of "survival of the fittest". According to Darwin's theory of evolution, we are all the pinnacle of our species. Thousands of years of the survival of the fittest has brought to realization this generation. We are the best and brightest in the history of our species, all who have come before us have provided the foundation to our greatness. 

So what did I see, you ask?

Firstly, I was at Walmart (and I am a Walmart shopper too but really, we've all seen "People of Walmart").

I'm in my car, nursing the baby, when an enormous truck pulls in next to me. I'm bored, so I'm watching. The driver, CLEARLY does not have enough room to open her door. But she tries anyway. She's a bit heavy set to boot. So she cracks open the door, slips out a leg and an arm, and even though she's not going to make it, she's still trying. She starts heaving against the door until a single leg, arm and boob have made it out. 

Then it happens.

She glances over and our eyes lock.

She's busted.

So she ungracefully pulls her extremities back into her enormous truck, turns on the engine, and gets the heck out of there. 

So really, best and brightest of all of time? DId the energy saved in the 'closer space' really offset the extra effort of trying to get out? I don't know Darwin, I think this one would have given you a run for your money.

Strut Miss L

So I know everyone thinks their kids are cute, but seriously, mine are.

L is at this perfect age, she's smily, and cuddly, and bashful. She is seriously, seriously cute.

Like strangers stop to talk to us cute.

Like, little boys stop to kiss my baby cute. (which I have somewhat mixed feelings on but...I digress)

Like, store clerks try to abduct cute. Really. L hung out with the owner, ringing in transactions, answering phone calls, merchandising shelves. I walked around the shop in town for about 20 minutes  before finally stealing her back.

And since Miss L has been somewhat left out from my recent posts, I thought I'd share a few shots of my cutie patootie.

scooting around the house

lovin' her Jolly Jumper

Just chillaxin with the puppies

Gotta love that smile!

Mystery Solved

I had the plumber out a couple of weeks ago. We're in a new house and I was convinced the toilet in the main bathroom was leaking.

They came in, added an extra wax ring, witnessed L's worst diaper explosion to date, and left. Since then the problem seemed to be solved.

And then I woke up this morning to C's wet socks in my bed and the realization that my toilet was not leaking at all.

Apparently my kids just can't aim.

Happy Monday!

Miracles Do Happen

It actually happened.

I never thought it would.

You know, you work and you work and you think, "maybe one day" you might reach your goal, but I can't believe it actually happened.

I reached the bottom of the laundry basket.

Completely empty, it hasn't looked like this since it came home from the store

It only lasted seconds before my kids put their freshly soiled clothes into it again.

But it happened. And I documented it. What an accomplishment. I am totally rewarding myself with a nap.

DIY: Rocking Chair Makeover

We have this beautiful old rocking chair. My mother used to rock my brother and me in it when we were babies, and I've rocked all three kidlets in it. Its got nice lines, but it was in need of some love. It was oak, with gold painted accents including some lovely fruit on the head rest. (ok...maybe not so much lovely as, well....tacky. Sorry mom)

Then there are the cushions. One on the back, one on the seat. If you've ever seen the Dateline investigations where they shine lights on fabric to see all the germs and creepy crawlies, these are probably on par. I read once that 10% of the weight of a two year old pillow was comprised of dust mites and their droppings (*gag*), so this pillow is roughly 30 years old...and so probably 150% dead mites. You can actually see the wear lines from the bars at the back of the chair. They are paper thin, and fairly revolting.

So... feeling very empowered by some recent diy reading, I decided to roll up my sleeves and take a stab at making over this chair.

I sanded it down lightly and then did two coats of matte black spray paint. I then lightly sanded some of the edges to mirror the finish on the crib, and finally added some spray lacquer.

The only thing I'm not loving is the fine layer of dust that blew over some of it when it was drying. Thought I was quite clever by opening the garage doors a bit to allow for ventilation. Oh well, I suppose if I get ambitious I can start all over. But, I wouldn't hold my breath on that one.

After the chair itself was done I picked up some gorgeous Amy Butler fabric and will be attempting to sew some cushions! Crazy I know, maybe I'll try and bribe James' Baba to help when she visits ;)

I didn't take before shots, but here are a couple of afters. The fabric is just tucked around the existing (revolting) cushions, but it gives an idea of what it will be.  Anyways, here's how it turned out:

Yay! One project off the list. I'm already starting on K's desk, so hopefully that will be done in the next week or so. Cheers!

He's Nothing If Not Honest

C seems to be stealing the show lately on my little blog. Maybe its just the age. He's just funny, in a completely nonchalant, unintentional way. He doesn't even know how funny he is.

The other day he's being a goof, marching around the kitchen. He's in and out of the pantry, around the island, strutting his stuff.

"What are you doing?" I ask him.

Without any hesitation he answers, "I'm tooting."

100 Things You May (or May Not) Know About Me

1. I've never done a 'meme' before, thought this might be fun
2. I'm still in my pjs and it's 10:37am.
3. That might sound like fun, but it's actually because I've been chasing battling children all morning
4. I am terrified of spiders...or really all things creepy crawly
5. I once took a quick nap outside on a sunny day and woke up to find a beetle had crawled in my ear
6. It was traumatizing and I don't really want to get into it
7. I am a natural blonde... insert blonde joke here
8. I've always wanted to color my hair, but never have because of the constant "why would you color hair like that, people 'dye' for hair like that"
9. This is going to take awhile
10. I married my high school sweetheart
11. My parents were also high school sweethearts
12. My paternal grandparents were also high school sweethearts
13. My daughter is named after both my maternal (Lillian), and paternal (Rose) grandmothers
14. I thought it was a sweet gesture even though when I told my grandma Lil that if I ever had a girl she'd be named Lily, my grandma's response was "why would you saddle her with a name like that?"
15. I've had the name picked out since I was 16
16. My (now) husband knew I had our kids names picked out and still stuck around
17. I have bought, lived in, and sold 4 homes in the past 7 years.
18. When James told me we have 2 more moves left in us I agreed
19. One to the nursing  home and one to the grave
20. Oh my God I'm only on number 20...
21. I spend most of my days yelling one syllable words, "Hey!" "Stop!" "ARG!"
22. I can admit that before having children, I actually uttered the phrase, "We have dogs, it's kind of like having kids"
23. To which my father responded, "Oh yeah? Would you give your dogs your eyes?"
24. Thought that was a pretty fair point
25. I'm right-handed
26. I use my hands a LOT when I talk
27. Even when I'm on the phone
28. I'm still sporting 15 pounds of pregnancy weight
29. I refuse to invest in any nice clothing until its gone
30. Most of what's in my closet is still maternity clothes, which by the way are my favorite since I don't have any body image issues whilst pregnant
31. I sometimes consider getting pregnant just for the clothing opportunities
32. I'm only half joking
33. I can actually hear my mother's eyes rolling from here
34. I was a great art student growing up- loved sketching in particular
35. I probably should have gone to school for something art related
36. I got my marketing degree instead because I thought that I would be able to have a more lucrative career
37. Instead I stay at home and do "arts and crafts" as James calls them
38. I have always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom
39. I have all the respect in the world for working mothers too, I just wanted to be at home
40. Unless you are obviously abusing your children I do in no way judge you or think that I am a better mom than you
41. The older I get, the more granola I become
42. I had midwives for my second and third baby and I use a baby wrap
43. I'm becoming more cynical about 'mainstream' medicine
44. I think that makes me sound like a hippie
45. I am allergic to a plethora of food items
46. I make most of what I eat
47. I love cheese
48. I love milk
49. I love dairy in general
50. I'm halfway through. . .suppose I could just change the title of the post to 50 things. . .
51. I use . . . far too often when I write
52. I studied grammar in university, its not that I don't understand the rules, it's that I choose to break them
53. I was a good student
54. If I could go back in time I would tell my student self not to take everything so seriously
55. I would also tell myself some useful financial information, like winning lotto numbers, to set myself up
56. I often daydream about time travel
57. I recognize how totally geeky that is
58. I enjoyed the movie 'The Butterfly Effect'
59. I'm a bit of a movie nerd
60. My first real job was a Blockbuster Video
61. Now that I have kids I know more about the latest Disney movies and Dora than I do about current events and pop culture
62. This year I officially became a soccer mom
63. I'm still coping with that
64. I am currently mini van shopping
65. Even typing that makes my nostrils flare in disgust. Bleh, mini-vans. The final step to admitting you are no longer even in the same area code as cool
66. I am turning 30 this year
67. I am surprisingly ok with this fact. I think I'm going to enjoy my thirties
68. I am learning to love myself and care a lot less what other people think of me
69. I think I have a pretty good heart
70. When I die, the one quality I would want people to have seen in me is that I was kind
71. My mother and my Grandma Lil are huge role models to me, both as mothers and as people
72. Holy crap this is long, I'm thinking that this 'meme' may not be as fun as I first thought
73. My house is perpetually messy
74. I am (no-so-secretly) envious of all the other moms who seem to have it so together
75. Most days I feel like I'm swinging by the seat of my pants
76. My husband likes to make up expressions, he says weird stuff like "fart in a hand-basket" which makes zero sense and cracks me up
77. Ok, so that one wasn't really about me, but I still think its funny
78. He told me once that if I was on "The Big Bang Theory" I'd be Sheldon
79. Sadly I didn't disagree
80. I snort when I laugh
81. My favorite toy when I was a kid was a stuffed lamb named (wait for it) "Lamby"
82. In Grade 2 we had a parade at school where we brought our stuffies. I told another kid it was named Lamby. The kid said, "Oh, is it a rabbit?" I remember even then thinking that kid was dumb.
83. I recognize that's mean and I'm sorry
84. Seriously though, why would I name a rabbit, Lamby? Really.
85. I love to swim
86. I wish I did it more often
87. My dream is to own a home with an indoor swimming pool
88. I think bacon and chocolate would go wonderfully together
89. I like my bacon so crunchy its nearly burnt
90. I like nap time a little bit too much
91. Whew, only 10 more. I am short
92. I sometimes forget how short I really am because my husband is also short (sorry babe)
93. I am a klutz
94. I stub my baby toe on a weekly, sometimes daily basis
95. I really don't seem to have any awareness of where my feet are in relation to my body
96. I have passed this onto Colson who constantly walks into/trips over random things
97. I lose keys
98. So much so that I am not allowed to hold onto our keys when I'm out with James, I will lose them
99. I've wasted so much time on this that Lily is already up from her nap and I didn't even get a shower
100. I'm DONE!

Brand Advocate... Crayola, We Need To Talk

I recently saw a blog post where a mom had been chosen to be a Brand Advocate for Crayola. How super cool is that? I would assume you get to try out the latest and greatest markers and crayons (ahem...I mean, your KIDS would get to try them out...yes, that's how it would go).

It got me to thinking, I could provide some great feedback on Crayola's products. Take for example, their washable markers. I mean, you wouldn't believe how easily they wash off. Let's say, for example, that your 3 and 5 years olds were supposedly watching a movie very quietly downstairs while you squeezed in a 15 minute shower. And let's also say, hypothetically, that instead of watching the movie quietly, they actually snuck into your craft room, took out said markers, and...oh I don't know... painted their entire bodies to look like tigers.

It would be good to know that those markers would wash off lickety split, just like Crayola said.

It's a Love / Hate Kinda Thing

This week I've had two separate people ask me, "Do your kids fight?". Which literally made me laugh out loud.

I mean, are you serious? I would have thought anyone within a 5 km radius of my home has heard my kids fight. They fight about everything. They fight about toys ("mine" "MINE"), they fight about not having toys ("You take this one" "NOOOO"), they fight about who sits where, who plays what. I once over heard an argument that went a little something like this:

"Yes"

                      "No"

"YES"

                      "NO"

"YYEESS"

                      "NNOOOOO"

When I asked them what they were fighting about, I kid you not the answer I got was, "He said yes"

Do my kids fight? HA!

The thing I don't get though, is that they really do love eachother. They bicker and fight and sit on each other and throw toys at one another, and then the second I separate them all I hear is a chorus of "I miss K" "I miss C".

Seriously, what is that? 

They look all sweet and innocent. In fact, they have long periods of loving play. Cuddling on the sofa, reading each other stories, playing and sharing nicely. But man, when they go at it, it's intense. If I'm going to make it through the next, I don't know how many years (please tell me it gets better as they get older...no? crap) I'm going to need to:

1. Stock up on Tylenol and Tums

2. Start drinking, like NOW

3. Buy a soundproof room...not sure yet if its to contain them, or for me to escape.

Sure they're cute. I mean, I have to admit I am an excellent breeder of children, look how cute those kidlets are. But don't let them fool you. Do my kids fight? Only when they're awake.

Still Got It

Do you ever have those moments when you forget, if only for a second, that you are a frumpy, mother-of-3, house wife and remember the days when you were hot? I mean, not that I was ever really "hot", but I used to get checked out, even hit on on occasion. Yes, its been a long time, but it did happen.

On Thursday we had a plumber out to fix a leaky toilet (with a set-up like that, you know the hotness is oozing in this story). Just as he was finishing up, L woke from her nap so I scooted upstairs, scooped her up and went back down. The plumber started to explain to me what he had fixed and why there was a problem. He was all "flanger" this and "wax seal" that, like I had a clue what he was talking about. In any case he was really staring at me, and I was thinking, "Yup, still got it". I had, as a matter of fact, actually fixed my hair that morning, and put on make up. I brushed my teeth and everything, real fancy like.

So I saw him out, and picked up the phone to call James when suddenly *sniff sniff* it hit me. The stink of fresh diaper, and I look down to see a Level 10 diaper disaster leaking clear from L's waist to her shoulders.

*sigh*

I should have known better. How super hot am I?

If I could put it in a pill

I remember as a kid listening to adults saying, "If I could find a way to put all that energy into a pill, I'd be rich". Har har har. I used to think it was so lame.

However.

Now that I'm a mom, I look at those kids and totally get the joke. K in particular drives me bananas. He is up at the crack of dawn and goes non-stop until he collapses at the end of the day. He's so inquisitive, which I think is great, but the constant "Mom, why do they call cowboys COWboys, and not HORSEboys?" "Mom, is my tooth going to fall out now?" "Mom, what do bees eat?" "Mom, when is my tooth going to fall out?" "Mom...MOM...MOM"

You get the point.

So what better way to burn off some extra energy than to go play soccer. Ah yes, 4 five year olds running back and forth, back and forth, back and forth across a giant field.

With, of course the occasional (ie every 3 minutes) water break. Yes, that will definitely burn off some excess energy.

Unless you don't read the bottle carefully. Because even though you read the ingredients you didn't read the label well enough.

Caffeine.

Crap...

Letter Art: K's New Room

As most of you I'm sure have noted, my kids don't have the most common names. We wanted it that way, but it makes it very tricky to find all those lovely 'name based' artifacts that kids love. There will be no pencils, magnets, badges, or sippy cups with my boys names on them, so starting with K's nursery I have lovingly made them each a set of letters for their walls. K's were originally just painted and antiqued in brown and blue, but with a new room I decided to redo his letters. I LOVE making them. I've done some for friends and family and each of the kidlets (I'm thinking of starting to sell them...anyone interested?).

They are each painted, then decoupaged in coordinating papers, then distressed (either with paint or ink, or some combination thereof), and then sealed.

Here are K's, hanging in their new location over the closet. We originally had them at the entry to his room, but his new map wreath and shelf have bumped them over.

I'm still planning on refinishing his dresser, but with sick kidlets I haven't even had time to bring the drawers downstairs. Oh well, no rush. I'll share when its done (unless, of course, its an utter disaster, in which place I'll never speak of it again, lol).

Bio Hazards

Warning, I am discussing body fluids. Let's be honest though, most conversations between moms end up on this topic at some point. Even at my hairdressers we wound up on the topic of potty training and poop. Its a sad reality about being a mom.

C is sick, again. Of the three, he's definitly the sicky. He's always congested or coughing. And he is a barfer. Any time he's sick, he's throwing up. I feel bad for him, but admittedly, I kinda feel sorry for myself too. Ugh, its amazing how as a mom you can handle the snot and the spit up. It doesn't even phase me to get poop on me. But I just can't get used to vomit.

K from a young age would know when he was going to be sick. But not C, the kid is a disaster.

So far he's thrown up three times this morning and I'm sure there's more to come. So I've come up with a solution. I've essentially saran wrapped his bedroom. I've used a painter sheet, but really, it looks like an old lady couch. Clever yes?

Until I really look at it and think, is this normal? I've plastic wrapped a bedroom - it reminds me of a bio hazard laboratory.

I am either a total genius, or a complete nutter. What do you think?

K's New Room

Ah. Four months since we moved and we are finally trying to settle in. As we do most summers, I've cancelled our tv, so we've been spending more time doing things. But in the evenings, once the kids are in bed, I've been on the computer more than usual.

I was shown this awesome website, http://pinterest.com/. Its basically a social bookmarking site (like Digg), but its much more visual. When you come across some you like, you 'pin it' to one of your boards. It will "pin" a picture from that site and it links back tot he original post. I LOVE IT. Its given me some inspiration to get crackin on some crafty diy's for the kids room and the rest of the house.

When we moved in, we were able to pick two colors of paint. Most of the house is being, but one of the promises we had to make to K to get him excited about (yet another) move, is to have a blue bedroom. So both the boys rooms were painted in a fairly dark, muted blue. They love it, but its pretty blue. Things are required on the wall to tone it down. So where to start?

I started here:

I love love love this vintage inspired boys room. Its clearly got an aviation theme, but I've got a train buff, so here we go. First project to tackle is that fantastic map wreath on the wall. I found a tutorial, stole borrowed a 1994 road atlas from my parents, broke out the hot glue gun and ink pads and got cracking.

Here's what I ended up with:

We put the shelf that I painted for K's nursery underneath, and put it all in the entry to his room. Next on the list is redoing some of his furniture. Here is a sneak a peak of my inspiration.